Birth Story

Here's the birth story I posted on my VBAC Moms group:

Hello, all! Sorry I didn't come by sooner, but I've been recovering from my son's birth on Sunday. Diarmuid Sanford Potter was born on July 20th at 11:24pm. He was 8lbs4oz and 19.25in long.

Unfortunately I was not able to VBAC this time. When I arrived at the hospital I was having strong, regular contractions, but not dilating at all. Normally I wouldn't have a problem with that, except that Diarmuid's heart rate began dropping drastically with each contraction. We tried to make him more comfortable, but after 12 hours we decided that with the distress my contractions were causing and the fact that I was not getting ANY closer to labor, we needed to go in after him. I felt very comfortable with this decision, and also felt like the doctor was not trying to push me into a c-section at all -- he even said he would have preferred for me to deliver vaginally and I felt we made every effort to make that happen.

The surgery itself was really scary for me. Last time I was all but unconscious between the various pain medications and exhaustion, but this time I was wide awake. The epidural did not take, which really freaked me out. The anesthesiologist was pricking me to see if I could feel anything, and when I could feel everything I freaked. They did a spinal, which worked perfectly, but at that point I was in tears, convinced it wouldn't work and they'd have to put me under. (And then I was afraid I'd still be able to feel it, but not be able to tell them.) Finally they let my husband in. He was really angry that they hadn't let him in sooner, especially when they pulled the tape off from the epidural and I screamed (it hurt!), but fortunately he didn't let me see how upset he was. He just stood where I could see him and kept telling me to open my eyes. I couldn't understand why he kept saying that, but I found out later that my heart rate kept dropping and they'd had to give me drugs (epinephrine, I think?) to keep my heart going several times.

When I heard the baby cry I relaxed a lot (and my husband says right when I relaxed my heart rate dropped again) because I had been waiting tensely for them to start, thinking I would feel at least pressure or something, and it was such a relief to realize they'd cut me and I hadn't even noticed and now the baby was out and ok. Diarmuid cried very loudly, and apparently he fought with the doctor and tried to bat their hands away as they cleaned him off, and didn't stop until Daddy took him. Then he relaxed and was happy in Daddy's arms. Thankfully he had no issues or complications except for a small cut on his head from the scalpel.

The rest of our stay went fairly smoothly. We refused the things we typically refuse, and they gave us very little trouble about it. The only annoyance was that they absolutely refused to let my husband be there for the circumcision, so now we have to find a pediatrician to do it who will. Breastfeeding is going absolutely wonderfully; no one so much as suggested I give him a bottle at any point. I came home with a fistful of prescriptions for pain meds and iron for my low hemoglobin count. (They wanted me to have a blood transfusion, but my husband and I felt it would be better and safer to treat it with iron and diet.) I still hurt horribly, but I'm getting better and I can mostly walk around the house if I do so carefully and don't try to carry the baby with me. The best part of course is seeing how thrilled my other children are with their new little brother. My 19 month old daughter absolutely adores him, and the first words out of her mouth when she saw him were, "My baby!" And she means it -- she'll try to take him from you if you aren't careful!

All in all I am grateful that Diarmuid was born safe and healthy and that we are both ok, but I am also feeling incredibly grateful for my three VBACs. I mean, I'm willing to go through this pain for my son, but I just honestly can't comprehend why anyone would do this to themselves on purpose. This is supposedly our last child, but there's always the possibility of more, and if I ever get pregnant again I sincerely hope to VBA2C. I really don't want to do this again.

I left a few things out, just for space, but that's pretty much the gist of it. For example, I found out that my placenta was anterior, and that this was revealed in the ultrasound I had at 21 weeks, but no one told me. It's not necessarily a serious condition, but it can be for someone with a prior c-section because it could lead to placenta accreta with the placenta growing into my old c-section scar. Which could have resulted in a hysterectomy! If I'd known that, I may very well have changed my plans and opted for prenatal appointments with an OB/GYN. Fortunately it all worked out for the best.

Like I said, I was "in labor" (only really not in labor) for 12 hours before we opted for a c-section. We tried various positions to make Diarmuid more comfortable so he would be ok during contractions, and I took oxygen to be sure he'd get enough, but it really didn't help much. We also tried to speed up my labor by breaking my water and then with a very small dose of Pitocin, but that didn't work, either. If he hadn't been in distress I would have just waited until my body was ready to give birth (even if it had taken another week), but I couldn't risk that he would suffer any harm in the meantime.

Granny stayed with us all day on Sunday, offering moral support while we tried to decide on the best course of action. She had to leave at sunset, so she wasn't there when Diarmuid was actually born, but by the time I went into surgery Pat had arrived and she stayed until Monday or Tuesday evening. Laura came up to visit with her mom, and brought some lovely gladiolas. Dave and Brandy also came up, on their way to visit a mutual friend at Saint Joseph's. Mark's company made an impressive showing, sending flowers at the hospital, a greeting through the hospital's website, and a beautiful cookie arrangement after we got home! That's on top of their generosity in giving Mark so much time off while I was pregnant and this week while I recover. (Mark told me they were considering a plan that would have everyone working from home a lot more, but I actually hope they don't do it because they've worked so hard to build a close, familial culture in the office and I'd hate to see it ruined with everyone spending so much time in their own little corners. Mark really loves this job, and he's been so happy ever since he started working there despite having worked some long hours, and I really think it's all thanks to the atmosphere. They expect everyone to give 150% and they treat you like family in return.)

So, I know what you are all waiting for is pictures. I honestly have taken very few, and even though Mark has taken some I haven't felt up to doing any editing and posting. Honestly, I haven't even converted the ones that were taken in RAW. I know y'all understand; a c-section is very painful and my energy level is just about nil. It's pretty much all I can do to nurse and gaze at my beautiful baby (he's really extraordinarily gorgeous, even compared to my other kids) and enjoy some quiet time with my family. So for right now I can only offer the small album that Mark set up while we were still in the hospital.

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Friday July 25 2008 at 06:04 pm | Family Life

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